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A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Pronunciation : TY-fuhn

(Greek Creature) TYPHON

Also known as TYPHOEUS

Created by Gaia from Tartarus as her Gigantes were bashed and banished, Typhon wasted no time trying to establish himself as ruler of the universe.

Being a mass of serpents from the waist down was bad enough, but he also had the head of an ass... which sounds a little upside-down. But there's no fun in his demeanor, or his one hundred arms that could reach ten miles in any direction, and when he charged Mount Olympus with boulders and lava spewing from his mouthes and fire shooting from his eyes the terrified gods did a runner to egypt and disguised themselves as animals.

No-one likes to have their manhood challenged so when Athena taunted Zeus for running away like a little sissy chicken baby he came out thunderbolts-a-blazing. You may think this was a one sided contest with Zeus winning hands down, but Typhon was a tough cookie. There was much too'ing and fro'ing as they went head to head for bragging rights and the Greek top god found himself locked in Corcyon cave minus his tendons.

And where were the other gods while this was going down? Still in Egypt! Athena cleared her throat and put on her finest chastising hat to try and gee them up...

'Bastards!' she cried, which seemed to get their attention.

'Zeus is getting his ass whupped and your cowering here disguised as... asses!'

Hermes and Pan were the first to buckle under the ferocious verbal assault and went to investigate. Finding Zeus guarded by Delphyne Pan let out his infamous ear busting war screech and while Typhon's monstrous buddy was running for cover Hermes leapt into action.

Hermes : 'Come on Zeus, what are you waiting for? Lets go!'

Zeus : 'Erm, it may have slipped your notice, Hermes old chap, but i don't actually have any tendons. As much as i would like to leave... I JUST CAN'T!'

Hermes : 'Oh yeah, would you look at that.'

By an enormous stroke of luck Hermes was a genius at stringing musical instruments and had Zeus back together in no time. Zeus was miffed, pumped and ripped, and the almost immediate rematch was a humdinger! Uprooted trees, mountain tops, hell, whole mountains flew as these two heavyweights played out the greatest scrap of all time. There was hardly a creature left alive on earth.

But, as any great fighter will tell you, size is no guarantee of strength, and strength alone is no guarantee of victory. Balance is the key, and as Typhon picked up Mount Etna Zeus let fly with a flurry of ferocious thunderbolts which tipped him backwards and he went crashing to the ground. Unfortunately, for all his brute force and ferocity, Typhon wasn't bright enough to let go of Etna and it crashed to earth too, burying him beneath. Suprisingly this didn't kill him and he still burps fire and smoke out of the mountain cap from time to time.

His mate, the equally attractive and approachable Echidna, cowering in a cave at this point, was allowed to live, as were their nasty offspring the Nemean Lion, Cerberus, Ladon (possibly), Chimera, Sphinx, and Hydra. Well, future heroes would need something to practice on!
Family Tree ...
Parents : Gaia and Tarteros
Spouse : Echidna
Offspring : Nemean Lion, Cerberus, Ladon (possibly), Chimera, Sphinx, Hydra
All deities are GM free & no Gods were harmed during site construction!
www.godslaidbare.com/Greek Gods
'TYPHON' - Greek entry : 26 April 2007
Page last modified on 17 Feb 2016
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